potty training and the gospel

we've been potty training for the last week, and i have to tell you, potty training is my parenting krytonite. it is hard. work. it has required a laser-like focus on cruz, which has left little time for work or london or showering. it has required constant creativity, as i try reward after reward to find something that will motivate cruz to actually put down his basketball and run to the potty. it has required a lot of cleaning.

during this week, tovi was finishing up the last week of soccer training camp, and as we expected him to be, was gone from the house all day every day. so for the last week, i have been stuck in the house with two kids, nursing one constantly, and hovering over the other. "remember to tell mommy if you need to use the potty." i have said this phrase no less than one thousand times, and it has worn thin with repetition. after a few very frustrating days of this, combined with a busy work week, a broken breast pump, late nights and early mornings, and just a lot of time alone with the kids, i finally exploded, "i am looking out for everyone and no one is looking out for me!"

but the beautiful Gospel truth is that God is always, always, always looking out for me. He knows when i'm tired, and He can give me energy and strength. He is with me when i'm lonely. when my child is baffling to me, he is not baffling to God. He even knows every single hair on my head (and the thousands that are falling out because that's what happens when your baby is three months old; He knows all about that too). if He knows that, how much more does He know the needs of my spirit. He knows me. He loves me. He is looking out for me.